Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Connecting the dots

Soo Kim, my Korean colleague was distraught. Her visa papers were misplaced. She remembered giving it to someone in the office, but couldn’t remember her name. Distraught she approached me for help, after ascertaining that I looked equally bad in English as her. I did not disappoint her.

Hai
Hai
You An...an...an
Jali
Yes, An Jalee
Yes?
My hmmm visa paper hmmm cannot find, yes cannot find.
Cant find? Bad, very bad
Yes, yes!
Where did you keep it?
Yes?
Where, you put? *gesturing into my bag*
No, no, no bag. Lady!
Great! We have approx 200 ladies here.
Yes, Yes, Yes!
Sigh

I called all the ladies on my floor, told them the reason for the meeting and asked Soo Kim to identify the person. Soo Kim, looked around and shrugged her shoulders. A clever colleague we call "Einsteina, asked Soo “What lady wear?" pointing to her clothes.

Soo Kim thought for a minute and said "big mole". Crap, I thought, what if the mole was someplace where looking for it could land me into a sexual harassment case with the HR!

"Where?' asked Einsteina, pointing to her hand and face. Soo Kim pointed to the forehead. It was obvious she was referring to a bindi or pottu.

What color?" someone asked.

"Red" came the reply.

All heads turned to Ms Blah Blah, who wears saucer sized red bindi’s. She wasn’t wearing one we noticed. We groaned at the thought of identifying the person all over again when Ms Blah Blah spoke up “Oh! This is the lady who gave me the papers today morning! How do I know she is the same Korean. They all look alike!!"

After restoring the papers to the rightful owner, we got together and bought a pack of bindi’s that we stuck on Ms Blah Blah's forehead with super strong glue so that it doesn't fall off again. She suffers from oily forehead you see.

We get frequent complaints from her that it doesn’t come off even when washed with the strongest detergent. But what the heck, till Soo is here, we are going to make sure, it stays. Every landmark is important to foreign tourists and we at Dot Bust Corporation ensure that our foreign colleagues are well taken care off.

In the meantime does anyone know of an industrial solvent that will remove really strong glue off delicate material like err skin?